Break.

I need a break.
I need a small amount of me time.
But I can't get it (take it when it's there).
I feel like I'm suffocating when I get a little alone time.
I feel like I'm trapped and won't be able to reach anyone.
I've started getting so down again lately.
I'm trying to ignore it.
I don't know what to do.

Just so you know.

Your kind of an ass.
You drive me insane sometimes.
I hate my phone when your name comes up once in awhile.
But then there's the time when all I want is to talk to you.
You make me smile constantly.

Why do you have to be so aggravating?

Me.

Getting back to who I was.
Who I was so long ago.
I lost me so long ago.
I had lost the kellyness that I was.
So many years ago, I don't even know that many people that know who I was.
B does.
She sees me coming back.
I feel me coming back.
The nervousness I've felt the past probably ten years is fading.
I don't have the fear of almost everything anymore.
I feel like I'm living for me again.

Just is.

Learning new things.
Like to shoot.
Like to have feelings for someone new.
Really enjoying everything.
Like his company.
:)

Unexpected.

Just that.
Unexpected.
And great.

Manic much?

To say I had a manic episode yesterday would be a hell of an understatement.
Woke up in a great mood that lasted most of the morning.
Then she called.
Really?
Apparently I just was not in a place to deal with one of our fights.
I spent the day hyper as hell chain smoking as best I could well at work.
Had to have driven courtney nuts since I talked nonstop about basically nothing.
Shaking the whole time bouncing all over.
I need to get to the doctor soon.
If this is going to be my reaction to a lot of things, which it seems like it will be.
I'm in for a ride that I am in no way prepared for.

A little scared.